That’s the City of Toronto! World class in every way.

I rode by this poor dead animal several nights ago at Eglinton and Avenue and, the only thing that’s happened in several days is PYLONS!
(someone actually cordoned it off with pylons!)
When I almost rode into it the other night I assumed there’d be a city truck come by and deal with it that night. It’s not a mouse or a pidgeon, it’s huge.
But no. Seems the city has some very strict (and bizarre) protocol involving large dead animals on busy streets. Apparently it takes several crews over several days to deal with matters that used to involve a guy in overalls, a shovel, some cuss words and a black garbage bag.

I figure all’s we gotta do is stuff some crack underneath it and the mayor himself will be by to deal with it personally. Otherwise it may take weeks for the ‘poke at it with a stick’ crew to come by to verify that the poor thing is dead so that dispatch can call the specialists in with the Rodent Spatulator 5000™ (an unnecessarily large, diesel powered vehicle with a big spatula-like contraption off the front of it specifically engineered to deal with mid-sized road kill.). & close off the entire block for several hours to deal with it.

Douglas Adams was right about who we’re descendent from… I wish it was apes.

Ah Shrinky Dinks! Remember these? No? Well, it’s probably a result of all the brain cells that burnt out as you and mom stood around the oven watching (and inhaling) plastic melt. For those of us in our 40s who are complaining about ‘the kids these days’ I think it’s a safe bet that the problem WITH the kids these days is that they’re the spawn of the kids THOSE days who were huffin’ on petro-chemicals in our kitchens.
Remember model glue? No, me neither.

Mayday March Toronto. 2014.
Another good turnout for an increasingly important event.
I’d like to point out that the ONLY media there tonight was Sun ‘News’ (think FOX if you’re not from Canada) wandering around looking for dumb people to talk to so they could try and belittle the event and the ideals. She stalked around a little like a vulture. I did overhear some very articulate responses to her simplistic and guided questions… I’m sure they won’t make the reel though… the media is SO liberally biased! So liberal, in fact, they don’t even care to show up.
Great beats for the march provided by several drum groups, the one that followed up the rear was super. Once we got out into traffic, it was a lot of fun looking up to see people hanging out of their condo windows and stopping on the sidewalks. Many had an ‘EW!’ look on their faces but there were a lot of supporters as well. (the one guy in the suit who had to cross through us seemed at first annoyed and then a little nervous.

New Work in ‘Cameras’

Last night I got myself distracted with my ‘poor man’s macro’ routine again and went a little crazy with my camera collection again. The results are in. In the CAMERAS section of Le Websité Chez Trout. As we say Troutsville:
checkitoutcheckitoutcheckitoutcheckitoutcheckitoutcheckitoutcheckitout!


I think I had other intentions tonight but I ended up getting intimate with some of my camera collection and my poor-mans, makeshift macro set up. (I can neither confirm or deny that those are underpants my Paxette is resting on but I can confirm they were clean.)

I think I had other intentions tonight but I ended up getting intimate with some of my camera collection and my poor-mans, makeshift macro set up. (I can neither confirm or deny that those are underpants my Paxette is resting on but I can confirm they were clean.)

The ‘Hurry Before (it’s already) Too Late Sale!’

That’s right folks, you read right, The Kreddible Trout Hurry Before (it’s already) Too Late Sale is already in full swing already JUST in time to be too late for the xmas gifting season!

Like all good consumerist institutions, we here at Kreddible Trout Industries and Subsidiaries should have been putting up the Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Eid al-Adha/Festivus/Solstice sale signs shortly after St.Patrick’s day, but the marketing department was experimenting with new theories on quantum-procrastination and practicing their drinking games so, once again, it’s left for me, the head honcho, who really enjoys commas, to make some last ditch plea to some of you art savvy late-season shoppers.

We got a veritable smorgasbord of delectable artstuffs for the person on your list who’s got everything (except an Original Kreddible Trout Uniquely Mounted Artstuff™)!

CHECK OUT BELOW FOR DEALS DEALS DEALS!!

- These two sultry beauties (10x15 prints mounted on 18x20, hand stained wood canvas) of shots taken in Thailand in 2008 have been marked down to $150 each or $250 for the pair. (left - ‘pinch' and right 'nice jug’) -

image

- This oddity (11 x 24 print on 16 x 31 mounting) of a shot I took in Hamilton in 2007 creatively titled ‘pay here’ is mounted on old kitchen cupboards and is marked down to $200. -

image

- This mounting of ‘furnished' (18 x 12 print on 18 x 24 mounting) is one of the favorites here at Head Office, but we'll be willing to part with it if it's being bought as a gift for someone who will love it. It's better than socks and has been marked down to $185. -

- This doosey is a cropped version of 'urban layercake with tree' (10.5 x 28) on a 4 foot x 2.5 foot reclaimed wood mounting. As those of you who’ve done your homework know, everything is hand cut/stained/mounted/bashed/hammered/sawed and screwed. Very little electricity is used except in the playing of loud rock and roll music. This piece is $300. -

image

- As far as favourites go, this one has been on the wall for a while. The shot, 'to shreds - something about identity and self worth' is on the All-Star team over here at KTP and it’s mounting is colour coordinated to make your eyes go ‘oh! Yes. Yes, that’s nice!' (18 x 12 print in 18 x 24 rescued window) We'll let this number go for $300 -

image

- this monster is called ‘a tale of four cities' and is huge-mungous. (15 x 13 prints on a 34 x 31 reclaimed window. This is a doosy. Going for the holiday spectacular price of $585 -

image

- And the all time favourite of the more recent works, the hand (& saw & sand-paper) distressed mounting of ‘man…where my bitches at' in a swank reclaimed window. (28 x 22 - ish print in 28 x 34 re-adored window.) There's a brief blog entry about the construction of this piece over here and some detail shots here. This one has a spot of honour here at Casa De Troutski but we’ll part with it and imagine it’s going to Tiny Tim. (no… not this Tiny Tim… ok… maybe that Tiny Tim too.). This little puppy is goin for $585. -

image

So there you have it! Deals so good even SANTA will be pissed at us! Listen to those 4 friends of yours on facebook who are encouraging you to ‘shop local’ and ‘support independent artists’ and buy a one-of-a-kind piece of art! From an artist! Like me!

and remember our holiday jingle:

"Nothin says Merry Religious or Non-Religious Holiday Celebration like a nice Piece of Trout™ under the tree!”

… now I’m off to go talk to the jingle writing division of KTP… they’ve had too much shortbread or something…

I’m famous on Nick’s Blog!

Had lunch with a friend and next thing I know, I’ve been BLOGGED! Nick got lost on his way to meet me and accidentally (though nothing accidental about it, he’s a really good photojournalist) made a bunch of awesome photos happen!

they can be found on his blog which this sentence links to.

And I take full credit as, if he wasn’t coming to meet me, he wouldn’t have gotten lost and those photos might never have happened. I expect royalties!